Parenting is tough, there’s no denying that. But at the same time it’s difficult to be a child in today’s overly competitive environment. No one is ever good enough till they get full marks and, even then, there’s always a higher goal to achieve, more people to please. In their quest to make their child the best of the lot, parents end up saying hurtful things to them. It may be said in anger, without thinking, but children remember this negativity and internalise it. Something that may seem insignificant to you may have a lasting impact on your child and shape who they become.
We asked 11 adults about what they think parents should stop saying to their children, and they answered out of personal experience. So, if you’re a parent, please don’t say these 10 things to your child.
“I think parents should encourage their children’s interest, not stifle it with such statements.”
“Parents should know that gender roles are one of the reasons they grew up messed up, and they have to end this shocking endless cycle.”
“Parents need to start looking beyond the doctor, engineer, lawyer aims for their children.”
“A child should be like themselves, not like someone else.”
“How does that even make sense?”
“Encourage your children to be themselves instead of telling them, from the beginning, that they need to conform to some illogical societal norm.”
“A child should have their own opinion. And parents should be happy if their child has the confidence to take on someone older than them and make sense while doing it.”
“You’re teaching your children that only the men of the house have the power to make decisions.”
“Saying these things, especially in public, when a child makes a mistake, is counterproductive. Berating a child like this scars them forever.”
“This constant reiteration of the things our parents do by way of a basic (however privileged) upbringing is a shit argument. You decided to have children, this is on YOU.”
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